|
Thursday, March 31, 2005
Super Hyper Morbid Obesity
I'm about 'fed' up with fat...intentional pun. How long can a person watch TV without seeing something about fat? My word. Last night relentless fat, fat, fat bombarded the screen. The lowest point took the shape of a pile of fresh, bloody, newly excised fat out of someone's body on a plastic surgery program. OY! I mean OY!!!!! I nearly wore out the clicker trying to avoid fat.
Just before I went to sleep, Discovery Channel took a 350 pound woman through a year of her life. The show began with bariatric surgery. The rest of it dealt with her recovery and subsequent diet/exercise program. Apparently the threshold for monster fatness begins at 100 pounds overweight. Now, the subject of this program was a fairly tall woman. I watched her carefully and concluded that I look as fat as she does. Also, my health is as bad as hers was. Exactly like that. Can hardly get anything done for needing to sit and catch my breath. So, I'm probably hyper super morbidly obese, too, although I weigh a couple of hundred pounds less than she did. I'm short enough that less fat produces the bad result.
Am I sufficiently shocked to start dieting? No, no. Nothing crazy like that. However, I might consider lifestyle modification. After surgery, her stomach only held 1/2 cup of anything before feeling miserably full. In a month of eating small amounts, she lost the first 70 pounds and began to breathe better. She could walk to the mailbox, for example.
I may just be willing to restrict myself to 1/2 cup-sized complete meals. Eat whatever I would usually eat in 1/2 cup amounts per meal. Also, I am willing to double the number of times/day I take Pork Chop for a walk. Further, I consent to weeding the flowers each day. Finally, I will drink water...at least a little of it.
Why couldn't I exist on 1/2 cup-sized meals? Pork Chop's diet meals are 1/4 cup total mass. She's mad about it, though. And sad. Last night all night her little tummy growled. Uh, wait a minute. We do not have parity. Pork Chop weighs about 6 pounds and eats 1/4 cup-sized meals. Given that ratio, I would have to eat meals weighing, what...er...running the numbers, here...6+ POUNDS?!??!?!?!?! Suddenly I do not support Pork Chop's right to whine. My goodness. The dog is gorging. Swinishly gorging.
View Latest Entries
|
