|
Thursday, July 8, 2004
Sleep Sheep
Two or three nights a week I can't sleep at all or wake up around midnight and then don't go back to sleep. What's the trouble? Probably panic attacks and stress due to this refried moving business. What are the sheep I employ to help me back to sleep? For a number of years when awake in the middle of the night, I would get whatever book lay nearby and read until the book fell over. The all-time champion put-me-to-sleep book is James Michener's Poland. Recently, though, I click on the TV and go to the TV Guide channel to see what's on. All night fairly good movies run on a variety of channels. The Learning Channel repeats its house-fixing shows until about 3:00 A.M. when it's infomercial time. MSNBC repeats its evening line-up. Lately I have watched movies. TV is becoming very potty-mouthed, but not quite as bad as the original movies. For TV the movies get bleeped quite a bit. Twice I have seen Orange County which spouts pottyisms left and right and cleaned up, it is almost incomprehensible at times. Very comical film. Next week I head for the beach and wouldn't you know, I saw Jaws II again just in time to keep me watching for shark fins all summer. The shark in that movie is scarey but not scarey, too. CGI work has come so far since then! The poor shark looks like a big plastic toy. Last night I watched a rarity, a movie with not one woman in the whole thing, not even as a person on the street. The title, Disorganized Crimereliably predicts the action. Both criminals and cops flub their way through a mildly amusing story.In my career as an insomniac I must have seen every infomercial that has been made and the third and second most annoying are the Jack Lalane juicer hostess with her gigantic teeth, and Ron Popeil selling kitchen accessories accompanied by a woman who never once looks away from his face. Somehow you feel she must have inside information and knows that anytime now old Ron P. is going to unzip his human skin to reveal his identity as a reptile from Planet X. She doesn't want to miss it. The entirely most annoying infomercialist is Tony Robbins emitting untold wattage, cheering, yakking, and boosting. He's so exhausting that he has on occasion put me to sleep. He IS the product he's selling. If the testimonials from customers are sincere, that man is a god to those who have bought his tapes. His speaking engagements look like religious revivals with him passionately preaching the gospel of himself.I have never watched a Tony Robbins infomercial all the way through, too, too, gooey. It's better to lie in the dark staring at the ceiling and just wait for morning.
View Latest Entries
|
